Team M-E-A-T

Calling all parents of young children...

2008-11-28T17:50:00.000-08:00

I am in the process of advising Santa on some things my children would like, and find myself attracted to the same things that I advised last year.

What are your kids "tried and true" toys? You know, the ones that have stood the test of time, let their imaginations run wild, lasted year after year? Give me some ideas, please! Write me a comment with any "hits" or "misses" you have!

To reciprocate, here are my recommendations:

A play kitchen (any brand will do - ours happens to be Little Tikes)
Loving Family Doll House (I love this doll house - you can purchase the people of different ages and ethnicities, which we did)
Tinkertoys (had 'em as a kid - and now Ethan and Abby absolutely love them!)
Legos (another classic)
All things "dress-up"
Geotrax Train System (we have lots of add-on, so our tracks can be really big!)

Things I thought would be great, but were flops:

Wooden Unit Blocks (I imagined my children creating huge playscapes with them, but they are not interesting to them. Better [and cheaper] choice - simple Legos)
Stuffed animals (my kids barely play with them)

Gettin' Flaky

2008-11-25T10:12:00.000-08:00

Yesterday was the first real snow of the season. Abby, Ethan and I went out in the great packing snow and made snowmen. Abby made her entire snowman herself, while Ethan's was a collective work of art.

Changes of season are always such a cleansing time...

Wintertime,
it's skates and sleds and featherbeds,
it's wintertime, Snow is all around.
Frosty nose and ears a throbbin'
then one day, "hey look! a robin!"
pulls a worm out of the ground.
Mother earth's about to change her gown...
[Tom Chapin, "Mother Earth's Routine"]

It's Summertime

2008-06-26T18:31:00.001-07:00

Tonight, an unplanned purchase at Target resulted in a great time in the yard with the kids next door.

I love summer.

Abby, the daredevil (this girl LOVES rollercoasters)

"Baby Tayla" (poor girl will never outgrow that with me - I've called her that since birth, and she'll be two in a couple of months)

Gracey was scared, but insisted on going like the bigger kids.

Ethan slid off the "raft" most of the time, but loved slipping and sliding!

My full grown kid, in his clothes.
I love this man.

No time, no time

2008-06-22T08:51:00.001-07:00

Time - I have none.

But I have just enough time to post this hilarious video I put together of my niece Courtney. I gave it to her as a bonus to her graduation video at her open house yesterday. And, yes, she took all of these pictures herself (as all of her friends do as well).

Try not to pee your pants.

10 Years Ago Right Now

2008-05-23T15:25:00.001-07:00

I was eating (or rather, not eating) at my wedding reception. I sat between Mark and Rob, Mark sat between me and Jennifer. When people would clink their glasses (mostly, my nieces and nephews), we would kiss in a silly way. One time, we turned to Rob and Jennifer and kissed them instead!

I had the best day on May 23rd, 1998. I was relaxed, and content. I knew I was making the right choice. :)

Home Again, Home Again, Jiggity Jig

2008-05-22T06:56:00.000-07:00

We are back from a week away in Gatlinburg, Tennessee with our dear friends Jennifer, Danny, Emma and Allison. The views were beautiful, the weather iffy, the number of things to do overwhelming, the company wonderful.

I will post later with the details of our trip, but for now, a humorous conversation with Ethan and Allison about superheros. [The best line is when Allison is going to be a "buffalote" (a.k.a buffalo).]

[You'll have to pardon my raspy voice - I lost it while on vacation]

6 Random Things About Me

2008-04-18T06:30:00.000-07:00

I was tagged by my best bud Jennifer to write a post about 6 random things about me. Here goes!

1. I am the happiest and most confident that I have been in my life right now. I have a great support group of friends. I have two kids that crack me up each and every day. I have a husband that goes above and beyond in everything. I am loving my 30's!

2. When I was in elementary school, in a brief effort to be environmentally conscious, I convinced my best friend Amy to wander around the neighborhood with me, collecting trash. She thought I was nuts.

3. Organizing something makes me giddy. I just recently cleaned out the cupboards under the kitchen sink, and I look inside whenever I need a little pick-me-up.

4. I have a short torso and long legs. I just recently realized that this is why pants that rise to the waist always look ridiculous on me. Thank goodness low-rise is in style!

5. When I was in middle school, I wanted to be different (funny, because everyone else wanted to be the same). I wore my dad's button down dress shirts and ties to school my whole 7th grade year. It actually started a little bit of a trend among a few of my friends.

6. I take a bath every night. Winter, summer, doesn't matter. It's my relaxation time. I have done this since I was about 15.

So... tell us 6 things about yourselves:

Jenny

Tracy

Gwen

Big Binder

Andi

Lynn

Rules:

Link to the person who tagged you.
Post the rules on your blog.
Write six random things about yourself.
Tag six random people at the end of your post by linking to their blogs.
Let each person know they have been tagged by leaving a comment on their website.
Let your tagger know when your entry is up.

Have fun.

We might need a little more religious education

2008-04-17T15:01:00.001-07:00

[Me]: Abby... who loves you?
[Abby]: Mommy loves me
[Me]: And who else?
[Abby]: Daddy
[Me]: Who else?
[Abby]: Ethan
[Me]: And who loves you the most of anyone in the whole world, ever??
[Abby, after careful thought]: Santa?

Lovin' the Cousins

2008-04-13T07:56:00.001-07:00

Friday night, we invited Lana and David over for a sleepover. Abby and Lana are 4, Ethan is almost 4, and David is almost 3. The kids had a GREAT time together, playing Polly Pocket, making their own "books" out of coloring pages, playing Superman, watching Underdog, chasing each other like crazy kids. The girls got to sleep in Abby's room, and the boys got to sleep in Ethan's room. The boys fell asleep after 30 minutes, but the girls had to be seperated after an hour of whisper-giggles. It made Mark and I smile to see the cousins enjoying each other so much.

I had a mini photo shoot just before the cousins had to go home so everyone could have naps on Saturday.

Mark was tickling them for this one :)

"Show me your silly faces"

"Show me your surprised faces"

"Show me your angry faces"

"Show me your sweet faces"

"Show me your sleeping faces"

"Show me how you love your cousins"

Reason #427 Why Mark is the Best Dad

2008-04-13T07:39:00.000-07:00

While I was away scrapbooking last weekend, Mark and the kids made projects out of an old box.
Mark is so much fun!

Abby's "Pony Sled"

Ethan's Buzz Lightyear Wings

And, of course, you need to take your sled down the slide at the playground!

And the Wings need a test-drive on the swings.

Easter

2008-04-03T07:31:00.000-07:00

And let the talking begin

2008-04-02T08:05:00.000-07:00

Ethan has a bad cold. Runny nose, coughing his guts out, draining ear (thank goodness there is one tube still in his ear).

Today, Mark brought Abby to school while Ethan and I chilled at home. Watched TV. Lounged. Ethan was completely silent ... until the cough medicine kicked in. And then he began a 30 minute monologue, that included this little tidbit.

[Ethan: Gazing at his Superhero underwear] "Mom, my favorite color is green. I really like to be Spiderman, but I want to be the green guy instead. What's his name?"
[Mom]: The Incredible Hulk
[Ethan]: The Credible Hawk?
[Mom]: The INcredible HULK.
[Ethan]: Incredible Hawk. I will be 'Credible Hawk and you can be Spiderman.
[Ethan]: I am wearing a Spiderman shirt, and you are wearing a green shirt! Oh no, Mom!
[Mom]: Let's pretend we're wearing each other's shirts. Good idea, huh?
[Ethan]: But your shirt has sparkles. 'Credible Hawk doesn't have sparkles. You can pretend you're wearing my shirt, and I'll pretend I'm wearing a green suit. That's a better idea.
[Ethan]: Credible Hawk is really cool, Mom. I'm really cool too.

An Update on the "T" of Team MEAT

2008-03-06T10:15:00.000-08:00

Here I am in October. I basically look the same now.
I lost 30 pounds, and kept it off!

I (Trista) had a big resolution for 2008. To save money. So far, using a service that tracks local area grocery store sales and combines them with weekly coupons, I have saved almost 40% off my groceries since the beginning of the year. And the percentage is going up each week! Also, my neighbor (Kool Neighbor Kim) and I started a cooking club with 6 moms, where we each cook six batches of a meal once a month and swap them. This has saved us from eating out (the biggest discretionary hit to our budget). I've also been cooking on my own a lot, and have actually been enjoying it! Who would have thought I had a domestic bone in my body. ;)
About 6 weeks ago, I started to realize that I was experiencing a lot of unexplained anxiety. I would have all of the physical symptoms of anxiety, that would be triggered by the most minor things. I often felt like someone was sitting on my chest, and I couldn't breathe. My mood has been generally negative and I alternate from wanting to cry to wanting to scream. After a few weeks, where the symptoms weren't going away or getting better, I began to recognize that I was probably experiencing a chemical imbalance. I saw my doctor, and we decided to try Zoloft. Zoloft made me nauseous all day long. Today, I am switching to Citalopram (aka Celexa). I should see an improvement in mood after 2 weeks. Here's to hoping! Anxiety has been very draining on me (and my family), and I have been functioning at about 30% of normal. It will be nice to be "me" again!
I recently found out that there may be an opening next year for a teachers' aide position at the kids' preschool. I have been thinking for several months now that my ideal job once the kids are in school would be an aide. I love working in the classroom with the kids (I've been volunteering quite a bit), I don't need to work for a lot of money (preschool teachers are ridiculously underpaid), I don't want a job with a lot of responsibility at this stage in my life, and I want to work part time while the kids are in school. Sounds like the perfect fit to me! I contacted the director, who is very interested, and we'll be meeting soon to talk about it. I am praying that this might be the direction God is pointing me toward. I would prefer to start working after Ethan is in kindergarten (in two years), but would not mind starting early if the job becomes available. Send a little prayer up for me.
I am starting to plan our two major vacations this year. The first is in May --- we are going on a joint vacation with Jennifer, Danny, Emma and Allison to Gatlinburg, Tennessee. It will be a nice week away from our regular lives, and we are renting a beautiful chalet complete with kitchen, living room and HOT TUB right in the unit. Sounds like heaven to me!
The second vacation is to celebrate Mark's and my tenth wedding anniversary (which will be May 23rd). I can't believe it will be 10 years already!! We thought it would be fun to share our vacation with Mark's parents, who will be celebrating 35 years in May. So the four of us are heading to Seattle in August for a week of sight seeing, in a city that Mark and I have always been interested in visiting. It will be so much fun! And it will also be the longest we've been away from the kids at one time... a little daunting for me. But they will be under excellent care here, primarily their cousin Courtney. It's so great to have loving family to count on!!
Kool Neighbor Kim and I are taking a pilates/yoga class. It made me realize just how out of shape I really am. Our instructor seems nice enough, but by the end she turns into the Pilates Nazi, whipping us into shape. I am always really sore on Thursday mornings.

I think that's all there is to report for now. I'll try not to let 3 months slip by before posting again. :)

An Update on the "E" of Team MEAT

2008-03-06T07:37:00.001-08:00

"Ahoy, Matey!"

Ethan will turn four at the end of May (gasp!)
When Ethan turned 3-1/2, he suddenly became more defiant. Like a lightswitch was flipped. He's growing out of it a little bit, but it is just so strange to see him acting up in ways he didn't previously. He's becoming his own little man.
Ethan has stopped seeing things as uni-sex and now makes distinctions between "boy" things and "girl" things. Sigh. He doesn't love the color pink anymore, and that makes me a little sad.
Ethan's birthmom is expecting another baby in the fall. They are placing the baby for adoption with a couple who doesn't have any children yet. Mark and I are still a little conflicted about whether it is good news or sad news that the baby won't be in our home.
Ethan is becoming very aware of his adoptee status and what that means. He likes to hear about how we met his birthfamily for the first time (while he was in his birthmom's tummy) and how he came to live with us. He also likes to hear about Abby's adoption. [Abby has yet to talk about her adoption or ask questions.]
I predict that Ethan will be reading before kindergarten. He can already identify the starting letter of any word that he hears, and just yesterday tried to spell our last name phonetically using the refrigerator letters. He loves words.
Ethan will be taking a sports sampler class this spring, and he can hardly wait. He asks every day "how many more days until I can play kickball, and t-ball, and soccer, and basketball and hockey??" He imagines he's going to have a team jersey with a number on the back. I think he may be a little disappointed. ;)
Even though Ethy is "all-boy" right now, he still loves to hug his Mom. Yippee!

An Update on the "A" of Team MEAT

2008-03-06T07:30:00.000-08:00

Stringing Beads

Abby is 4-1/2. She will be 5 in August.
Abby takes a ballet/tap class one hour a week, for 4 & 5 year olds. She has been loving the class, and has learned a lot of different dance steps. She will be part of a recital at the end of May - I can't believe I have a child old enough to be in a recital already!!
Abby has always had ups and down in her behavior. She is a spirited child. She does things that she wants to do, when she wants to do them. This is a difficult fit for a school environment. Or a church environment. Or a home environment (sometimes-- we can definitely be more accomodating and forgiving). November, December and January were very good months, behavior-wise, on the "Abby Scale" (which differs greatly from most other kids). February and this part of March have not been good, especially this past week. She "stole" four things from school/church/other kids over the past two weeks. She hasn't been obeying her teachers at school. And yesterday, she went over to the craft center in her classroom and cut off a few handfuls of her hair. She has also been sleeping a lot (3+ hour naps!), which usually indicates a growth spurt. And bad behavior is always part of a growth spurt. I just hope this one is quick.
Abby can write all of her letters now, upper and lower case. She is still working on numbers (there is no interest in them at this point, so learning is slower). She is very good at cutting with scissors, and she can draw well when she is interested. Otherwise, just big scribbles.
Our current plan is to put Abby into kindergarten in the fall, vs. Young Fives. Her preschool teachers and Mark and I feel that Abby is more than capable to handle the workload of Kindergarten. She is very bright, and when she is interested in something or is paying enough attention, she easily picks it up. She struggles with focus, especially when the classroom is buzzing with activity. Mark and I don't feel that holding her back from kindergarten for a year will change much for Abby, other than another year of maturity. She may always struggle with focus. We need to find a way for her to be able to focus herself when need be.
Abby has really blossomed socially in the past 6 months. She has lots of friends at school. She is the social butterfly at any public children's place that we go. She is really enjoying playing with kids her own age now, and doesn't spend her time shadowing The Slightly Older Girl (TSOG).
Abby's favorite things in the world are beautiful or fragile treasures. She has a large crystal that she received from Gammers and Grampa that is her most prized possession right now (her "magic jewel").
Abby loves to feel like she is older and has responsibility.

An Update on the "M" of Team MEAT

2008-03-06T07:21:00.001-08:00

Sledding on New Year's Day with our friends Andre and Anna (we had a BLAST!)

Well, it has been a long while since an update, so here is a brief synopsis of what has been going on with our head-of-household, Mark (aka Marky Doodle).

Mark has been working wicked overtime lately. Huge deadline at work. That has been lingering well beyond the original deadline of 3 weeks ago. Lots of nights on the laptop until 10:00 or 11:00, when he falls into bed and wakes up the next day to be at work by 7:00. Supposedly, the real deadline is tomorrow. We shall see.
Mark turned 33 last month (happy birthday, Babe!) He had breakfast in bed prepared by the kids, along with cool pictures they drew for him. He bought himself a writing tablet for the computer (which he's been yearning for for a few years now). Now he can do his doodling on the computer as well as paper. :)
I recently found out that Mark does not share my love of artichokes. I was shocked. I told him that for him to keep such an important thing from me for all these years is an indicator of trouble in our marriage. ;) just kidding.
Mark shaved off his mustache before Christmas (I think?). Only 4 people have noticed since then. That cracks me up.
Not much else to say about Mark. With no free time, he hasn't had much going on. We're trying desperately to plan a vacation to an indoor waterpark, but can't come up with a date that will work for all four members of our family until April. When did we get so busy??

From our Family to Yours

2007-12-16T05:13:00.000-08:00

In the words of Abby...
Merry Christmas
and
"Have a New Ear!"

$20 Santa

2007-12-02T08:25:00.000-08:00

$20. That's what I spent for the rights to this digital picture. Taken with Santa at the mall. On the spur of the moment. With the kids in their school clothes from that morning, and their big clunky new boots for the quarter inch of snow on the ground. With Ethan's surly smile and Abby looking like she's ready for bed. Ethan asked for a new Krypto Superdog toy. Abby asked for a purple skirt and a Barbie purse. They were both in awe and delight at sitting on Santa's lap.

I love it.

My Baby. My Big Girl.

2007-10-22T22:12:00.000-07:00

Abby is the most precious, beautiful, talented, curious, hilarious little girl I know.

Abby is the most stubborn, strong-willed, overly-independent, curious, frustrating little girl I know.

These things all reside simultaneously within a girl-child who is at one moment an amazingly bright 4 year old, at another a tantruming 2-year old, and at yet another a precious and cuddly infant.

Some days, I can't get enough of Abby's silly antics and adventurous nature.

Some days, I have had my fill of her antics by 9:00. In the morning.

Today was one of the latter.

So to remind myself of what a precious joy that my daughter is all of the time, regardless of her behavior, I look at pictures like these. And my heart overflows with love for the sweet and precocious little girl who calls me Mom.

Autumn

2007-10-22T22:02:00.000-07:00

We love autumn. It's our favorite season. The beautiful leaves changing colors, pumpkins, cooler weather, long shadows as evening approaches.

Here are some autumn shots through the years, reminding me of just how quickly my children are growing.

A pictoral summary

2007-10-08T21:50:00.000-07:00

My two Big Kids getting ready to start preschool again this year!
Abby had a rough start, but has hit her stride with a new teacher Miss Damian whom we LOVE! Just this week, Abby stayed on the rug during the entire 15 minute circle time (for the first time) -and- cleaned up all of the dress-up area without prompting (for the first time). There is hope for Kindergarten yet!
Ethan is doing fabulously in his 3 year old class. He started this year knowing his letters and letter sounds, shapes, colors, and most of his numbers, but his new teacher Miss Jennifer is finding ways to challenge him.

Abby turned FOUR! She had a spectacular Tinkerbell party, and even got everyone to dance the chicken dance for her birthday (her favorite dance).

Jennifer, Donielle, LeeAnn, Jenny and Me (Missing: Merideth)
My Jennifer's have finally met! We went for a girls' weekend away to scrapbook, talk and stay up way too late (isn't that always the way it goes?) Jennifer and her sisters, Jenny and I ... it was a lot of fun!

My super-silly Superkids!

Abby has made huge developmental progress over the last 3 months! Here, she drew a picture of "Awful Alvin" (from LarryBoy) just like Daddy did - - - isn't it good? I love the squiggly hair.

Ethan loves music. Here, he's playing the Melodica, but the amazing thing is that he found a newspaper ad that has music notes in it (on the right-hand page, at the bottom) and he "played" the music. Then he wrote out his own music on the green paper (see all the lines - they're notes).

Did you miss me?

2007-10-08T21:45:00.000-07:00

So.

I have been absent. At least here. For a few months.

Lately, my life has been beyond overly busy. I have taken on two large projects (one for church and one for preschool) that have sucked.up.all.my.time.

Rewarding? Sure. Stupid? Definitely.

And now, as I sit writing this at 12:47 a.m., I realize yet another bad side effect of being over-extended. Insomnia.

But, one good thing comes. This blog is finally going to get a little update. Enjoy!

Camping is made for Abby

2007-07-26T06:37:00.001-07:00

Wonder
Abby and her centipede --- "I love him so much, Mom!"

A Good Ending to a Bad Day

2007-07-25T14:49:00.000-07:00

This morning was not a great morning. I woke up tired and crabby. I didn't get nearly as much done as I'd hoped while the kids were at the babysitting co-op. I've mentally looked up my "to-do" list and I can't even find the bottom of it. I'm feeling a little overwhelmed with the tasks on my plate right now. So this morning put me in a foul mood.

But things have turned up. I had a weigh-in today at Weight Watchers and discovered that I have finally met a milestone I've been eyeing for a month now - I am down 25 pounds (and a half!) I have 7 more to go until I'm at my goal weight - I'm so hopeful I will make it by my original deadline of Abby's birthday (August 26th). It's definitely attainable!

In other good news, I am going away on a scrapbooking weekend with Jennifer and her 3 sisters in just two short days... and today I found out that Jenny will probably be able to come, too! I can't imagine a more fun girls' weekend, with some great girls!

In a little while we are headed to one of our local kids' gyms for some open gym time, which should be really fun. All in all, a great ending to a day that started out poorly. Yay!

Is it sacreligious...

2007-07-13T12:52:00.000-07:00

...if I see Ethan playing with a rosary, animating Jesus on the cross walking down the street yelling, "c'mon, beads!" as they trail along behind? Oh yeah. And I laugh out loud.

Just wonderin'. ;)

This one's for Jennifer

2007-07-11T08:23:00.000-07:00

I have decided that I will share with you the names that Mark and I would have chosen for Baby #3. Last year, I listed the names that we considered, but were not chosen. But it's time to drop the big ones on you. [The middle names are for our great friends, Jenny and Paul, who would have been this baby's Godparents.]

The girls names are....

Leah Jennifer (runner up)
Elise Jennifer (the winner)

The boys names are...

Aaron Paul (runner up)
Simon Paul (the winner)

The end of waiting

2007-07-11T08:06:00.000-07:00

It has been almost 2 months since our deadline past for adopting another baby. We set Ethan's birthday as our deadline over a year ago, giving ourselves a firm cutoff of when we would stop being "in waiting." When we figured our lives could be back to normal.

The truth is, I didn't pour as much of myself into waiting this time around. I didn't do any advertising or networking. I didn't look for situations that might work out. I didn't put much effort in at all. My life already was "normal", so there was no need to return to it.

It has taken me a year-and-a-half, but over that time I became perfectly OK and happy with being a Mom of 2 kids instead of 3. For all my complaining, I do realize that I have two amazing kids. Kids who are great friends to each other. Kids who are so different from one another in personality, temperament and interests. But yet kids who really, really enjoy one another. If you ask either one who their best friend is, they will choose each other. They are growing up together, sharing stages together. They are already close in the exact way I missed growing up with 3 much-older sisters.

Since May, I have been waiting for the dams to open up and the flood to come, the flood of my grief over the finality of our family unit. But they haven't come. Even when I feel tiny pangs of longing when I see a newborn, and I turn in on myself to really feel what I am feeling, the tears are few. I feel a little guilty about that, like maybe we shouldn't have even put ourselves out there for another adoption. Like maybe I didn't really want it as much as I should have. But then I remember that 18 months ago, I felt very differently than I do today.

And I think I understand what has happened to me in the last 18 months to change me so much. I have finally become content with what I have.

Summer, glorious summer

2007-07-11T07:44:00.000-07:00

For the last month or so, our family has had one priority... to enjoy summertime. To soak up every second of fun that we can. To enjoy the weather, and each other.

We've succeeded.

Here are some pictures from the last month to let you know what we've been doing.

Ethan had a great 3rd birthday party with our immediate family. He had a space theme, and everyone got to make their own space hat. It was fun!

Our 5th tri-annual (once every three years) family reunion for my dad's side of the family. 61 of us met up in Tennesse for lots of great times. The kids especially had a ball!

Abby and Ethan's first time bowling. We shared the day with their cousin, Dylan. We had such fun!

Camping trip #1 (of 4, I think). The campground had lots of stuff to do. And we were lucky that our friends Jenny and Paul and 5-year-old Aidan came out to visit with us one night!
Check out my new campfire coffee percolator (thanks, Mom and Dad-in-law!)

My poor chipmunk! Mark got his wisdom teeth pulled last Friday. Yesterday, he had to go in because he thought he had a dry socket. The prognosis: "you're old." It's going to take a long time to get back to 100% for a 30-something patient. ;)

We had a visit from Mark's sister's family (Tracy, Jeremy, 3-year-old Lana and 2-year-old David). The kids had a great time playing!

My curious girl found my nail polish and decided to paint her toenails in the foyer (the left foot - pink on top of the white that Grandma had painted). Thank goodness she was very neat!

We spent a day with my parents at a local waterpark. Abby is enjoying the splash fountains, and Ethan loved to send the beach ball flying in the lake.

You Like to Read, Right??

2007-06-06T13:05:00.000-07:00

My bestest friend, Jennifer, has challenged herself to read 52 books in 2007. She writes reviews of the books and posts them here.

She has added a fun little challenge for herself where she will select one of us to choose her 30th book to read. The best part - she will send us her copy of the book once she's done! A free book, and a well-written review! What's better than that?

I hope you'll join me in entering the contest. All you have to do is write a comment on this post by Friday. Easy-shmeesy. And I promise, Jenn doesn't bite. :)

I've Never Been So Excited About A Keyring

2007-05-30T16:54:00.000-07:00

I've reached some major weight loss milestones.

First, I am down a size in pants and shirts. My old jeans are pretty much falling off. I have been adjusting my belt 4 notches from where I used to be.

Second, I am over half-way to my weight loss goal.

Third, I have lost 18 pounds in 9 weeks - that is a 2-pound-per-week average.

Fourth, two people who I haven't seen in months have taken one look at me and said, "Wow - you've lost a lot of weight!" That makes me happy, because it's hard to see the difference on myself since it is gradual.

Fourth, I have lost over 10% of my original weight. With the 10% loss, Weight Watchers gives out a keyring.

I'm so damn proud of that stupid thing. :)

Happy Birthday to My Son

2007-05-24T13:01:00.000-07:00

Today, Ethan turns 3.

Where has the year gone?

Into mud puddles, and belly laughs,
into super snacks, and Buzz Lightyear,
into squeezy hugs, and climbing monkey bars,
into being a great friend, and loving preschool,
into a new favorite color (pink), and spaceships.

I can't wait to see where the next year will go.

Birthday breakfast to Ethan's specs: Rice Krispies with 3 big strawberries (stems cut off, Mom!)
The "Birthday Boy" hat
Ethan's lunch request: Sunshine PBJ with carrots and crackers (the dip in the middle is yogurt)

"I'm THREE!"

Nine is Fine

2007-05-23T07:03:00.000-07:00

Nine years ago today, I woke up after a very restful night of sleep.

I walked out of my room to the "today's the day!" sign my Mom had made for me.

I danced in the living room with my Dad.

I got my hair done with my Mom, bridesmaids and nieces.

I arrived at the church in my Dad's button down shirt and a pair of shorts.

I got fully dressed in the priests' vestibule.

My friend Amy put a penny in my shoe for good luck.

I watched the bridesmaids and groomsmen walk to the front of a beautiful church with our loved ones there.

I watched Mark walk down the aisle between his parents, waiting for me with a small smile on his face and tears in his eyes.

I listened to the music change.

I took my parents' arms and walked slowly down that same aisle.

My heart was leaping and I could only focus on the man waiting for me.

My Dad stepped on my dress. :)

After what seemed like forever, I finally recited my promises to Mark.

After what seemed like forever again, I finally kissed my husband and walked back down that aisle.

It was simply amazing.

Happy Anniversary to the man who still looks at me with that small tearful smile, and still makes my heart leap.

Happy Mothers Day to all you Moms!

2007-05-13T09:22:00.000-07:00

Garage Sale Philosophies

2007-05-12T14:04:00.000-07:00

Garage Sale Mantras

Mark: Put a "25 cents" sticker on it. It'll sell! [a.k.a. EVERYTHING must go!]

Trista: If the sale is neatly organized, everyone will buy more. [We got at least 15 comments about how this was the most organized garage sale people had been to.]

Abby: If it's an item of girls clothes or shoes, and I have ever worn it in my life, it's still mine and you can't have it!

Ethan: Wow.... look at all these toys!!

The end of the Garage Sale

2007-05-12T13:50:00.000-07:00

Day two of garage sale. Final day.

First customer wanders in at 9:15.

Big items sold: 2 highchairs, my mom's comforter set, countertop dishwasher.

Little items sold: A TON more clothes (how in the heck are half the clothes still there???), housewares.

Day two total: $282

Grand total: $897 (including $100 owed to my mom and my neighbor)

Who would have ever thought we could make $800 at a garage sale???

Man, am I tired

2007-05-11T15:54:00.000-07:00

Day one of the garage sale.

People started showing up at 7:30 (the sale didn't officially start until 9:00).

Big items sold: 3 exersaucers, the swing, the crib, 2 strollers.

Little items sold: A TON of clothes, lots of toys.

Day One Total: $615.

Holy cow.

Busy busy busy

2007-05-09T11:43:00.000-07:00

I've been incredibly busy lately. One of my priorities is a garage sale I'll be having this weekend.

This is the official "we are done having babies" sale. We gave ourselves a deadline of Ethan's birthday (in 2 weeks) to have a match or adoption placement. Since it doesn't look like that will happen, we are cleaning out our house of all of the stuff that goes with babies and toddlers!

Included is 40 boxes of girl/boy clothes up to size 3T, a crib, swing, exersaucer, stroller, infant car seat, bottles and sippy cups, tons of toys, etc. It's all going to leave my house one way or another! ;) I'll let you know how I do!

Who is the cutest girl in the world?

2007-04-27T08:23:00.000-07:00

You'd better be thinking Abby! ;)

10.5 in 4

2007-04-27T07:49:00.000-07:00

WW results: Down 10.5 pounds in just 4 weeks! Woohoo! My clothes are definitely feeling looser - I can't wait to buy new things in smaller sizes.

I LOVE this program. I am no longer eating beyond being hungry. And I eat foods that are much healthier. AND I even eat dessert every single day! What's not to love??

Mark has also been doing well - down 6.5 pounds!

A Boy and a Frown

2007-04-18T17:42:00.000-07:00

A Girl and A Water Glass

2007-04-18T17:38:00.000-07:00

WW Update

2007-04-12T16:39:00.000-07:00

The good news: I'm down 7-1/4 pounds from last week.

The bad news: I had the stomach flu.

Coincidence?

I think not.

[I do estimate that about 2-1/2 pounds was true loss, while the other 5ish pounds were flu-related - probably mostly water. Boo.]

Happy Easter!

2007-04-08T09:00:00.000-07:00

Christ the Lord is risen today! Alleluia!

WW Progress

2007-04-06T06:48:00.000-07:00

I'm into my 2nd week of Weight Watchers. At my weigh-in on Wednesday, I discovered that I lost 3/4 pound! This isn't a huge weight loss, but it's significant because I had two birthday parties to attend this past weekend (with lots of foods that are worth lots of points). I still lost weight - and I even ate birthday cake at both parties! Woohoo!

The biggest self-discovery over the past week has been that I often eat beyond being hungry. I will eat until I feel "stuffed" instead of just "full." That's my problem at meal-time. Another problem is grabbing food when I'm bored, or it's just sitting in front of me, despite my hunger level. And my third big problem is choosing really high-fat or high-sugar foods over healthier options.

I feel good about my progress. We'll see what week 2 has in store for me!

Bye bye, cheese

2007-04-03T11:11:00.000-07:00

You know my cheese cooking challenge? I'm going to have to give it up.

I have been feeling really, really tired this past winter. More so than usual, although I always feel run down when winter comes. I have had my thyroid checked in hopes that there might be an explanation. But everything is normal.

I have figured it must be extra weight I am carrying, paired with lack of exercise. All of it only exacerbated by a less-than-ideal diet. So, Weight Watchers seemed the way go to.

I joined Weight Watchers last Thursday. And honestly, I don't feel deprived of food at all. I feel great! And I am now very conscious of eating when I'm actually hungry for food instead of just bored.

If you don't know, the "flex plan" of WW is based on a point system. I have so many "points" to spend each day on food, plus additional discretionary points to use throughout the week. So, I have been heavily researching what foods are worth what point values to see what foods I am willing to "save up" points for and which can be let go. In my research, I discovered that my normal Steak 'N' Shake meal costs almost 3 days worth of points - - - all in one meal! (64 points, for those WW fans!). Bye bye, Steak'N'Shake.

It's been really good, and I'm really confident I can lose weight on this plan. I'm excited! I'm really blessed, too, because Mark is doing it with me, which helps me out so much. There is no temptation to eat a giant piece of cake if Mark isn't eating one in front of me. I can hardly wait to weigh in tomorrow!

JUST.SHUT. UP.

2007-03-25T18:07:00.000-07:00

Why in the *bleep* are we Moms so judgemental of each other??

Take this woman I am friendly with in my Moms Group. She is wild and crazy and hilarious. She is kind and friendly. But I sometimes just want to tell her to SHUT. UP.

On more than one occasion several of us moms have been discussing potty training. Although Abby and Ethan are now pretty much done with potty training, it took a loooooong time to get there. And it was the most frustrating parenting task I have had to complete. So these discussions with other moms (who share their own potty training woes) usually make me feel better about my own situation. I am definitely not alone.

And then my spunky friend (let's call her Sonya) always jumps in.

"Potty training after age 2???" she always asks, shocked by such a concept. "My kids were all done by their second birthday. And the longest it took me was two weeks to potty train."

At times like that, I want to tell her to JUST.SHUT.UP. Unfortunately, there are other instances when Sonya opens her mouth when it should remain closed.

The other day, my friend was sharing with the group how she was locking her son into his room at night because he had gotten up a few times in the middle of the night and gotten into dangerous things before his parents discovered him. Her pediatrician recommended locking him in for his own safety. (Boy, can I relate!)

Sonya pipes up with, "My kids wouldn't dare do that. When I tell them no, they listen!"

Again, I want to tell her to JUST.SHUT.UP.

I don't think Sonya intends to insult us. And really, it doesn't make me feel badly about my parenting abilities when she says these things. But I recognize that as Moms, we are all vulnerable at certain points in our parenting. Sometimes comments like these can push us over the edge. They can make us question our decisions. And make us feel like we're doing a rotten job. Not exactly the pick-me-up that we so often need.

So whenever I hear a "Sonya" spouting off about how their kids would never do "X" or about how easy it is to get your kids to do "Y", I silently think JUST.SHUT.UP.

And then I get an evil smirk on my face as I hatch a plan to send Abby to her house for just one week. I bet she'd change her tune. ;)

Lunch and a Show

2007-03-24T11:17:00.000-07:00

The kids serenaded us over lunch today. Enjoy!

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Our First Adoption Question

2007-03-23T19:03:00.000-07:00

We have always been open with Abby and Ethan about their adoptions. We "discuss" it with them (more like a monologue, actually). We have pictures of their birthfamilies on the fridge and talk about them. I've even used other women's pregnancies to bring up the subject of how babies grown in tummies, and Abby and Ethan grew in M's and S's tummies. I've often wondered how much has been getting through.

Wednesday, when we arrived at preschool, we spotted another mom with her child entering the building. Something about her must have looked familiar to Ethan. He then asked me, "is that my birthmom?" I explained that no, it wasn't his birthmom, S.

Now that the door is opening, I'm curious to see what other questions are going to come out.

The Future of Fashion

2007-03-19T19:17:00.000-07:00

Oh, how my children are learning new things. And boy, can I underestimate how developed their logical brains are.

Today, I brought out the summer clothes for the kids (I know, it's really early, but it was easy to do and I enjoy it, so there). After I washed the clothes, I let Abby have a fashion show to try on her summer outfits [I will have you know that nothing from last year fits anymore - that girl has grown like a weed again]. She tried on a few dresses that she liked. And then I tried to convince her to model a shorts set. A shorts set is a hard sell to a girl who would wear tights and skirts or dresses every day of her 3-year-old life, if I let her.

"Oh, Abby, this is so cute!" I exclaimed in an over-the-top voice.

"Yeah, so cute!" she agreed.

"Do you think you should try it on?" I asked non-commitally. "Just to see if it fits?"

"Ok!!"

And so she peeled off the 3 layers of dresses she already had on. Pulled on the shirt. Pulled on the shorts.

"Abby, you look great!"

Abby's face was annoyed. She started to tug on her shorts.

"I like your shorts, Abby, perfect for summertime!"

Abby frowned and wandered away. I helped Ethan with his hand-me-down Buzz Lightyear summer pajamas, happy that at least he was pleased. After a few minutes, I called to Abby. No response. The kids know that when I call their names, they should answer. I called again, this time louder. No response.

I got up and headed down to the basement. At the bottom of the stairs, I looked into the office. Abby was sitting on my desk chair wearing a guilty look and holding a pair of scissors. I freaked out. Abby started to cry. I felt bad and scooped Abby up after putting the scissors away, explaining the dangers of using scissors unsupervised.

On the way back up the stairs, a lightbulb went off. I realized what Abby was doing. And I verified it by examining her shorts.

She was cutting her shorts apart at the crotch seam to make a skirt.

By Jove, I think she's got it!

2007-03-19T14:45:00.000-07:00

I am *fairly certain* that we have reached nirvana. We are [dare I say it?] currently diaper free. We put diapers on the kids at bedtime, but they are usually dry in the morning. For the past week or so, there hasn't been a day-time accident (other than the oops-I-didn't-quite-make-it-to-the-potty-in-time dribbles that can happen occasionally). And that includes the infamous #2! Abby has been doing so well in that regard that she earned herself a pair of ballerina slippers that I have been tempting her with for a month now. After lots of encouragement, she finally filled up her marble jar for going poop on the potty, and she got her prize [which I bought at the Target Dollar Spot - man, that spot sucks me in every time]. Now, Abby acts as if the potty is no biggie. It happened just like everyone said it would - she potty-trained precisely when she decided to, no earlier and no later.

Score one for free will, score zero for parental control. ;)

Phunny Photos

2007-03-15T08:35:00.000-07:00

At the carnival for our local elementary school (where Daddy took the kids on Mommy's scrapbooking night): Abby is a cat (of course) and Ethan insisted upon being a reindeer. The face-painting girl didn't know exactly what to do for a reindeer, but improvised with a red nose and freckles.
Ethan's Forever Family Day party (6 weeks late!) Everyone has blue tongues because Mark bought ice cream cake with cotton candy ice cream (which was really bright blue!)
Abby is always our little Fashionista! And where did we go in such a get-up? To the playground!

Come Along for a Tour

2007-03-14T07:15:00.000-07:00

As I mentioned before, we are in the process of decorating & organizing our home. We have spent countless hours on these tasks over the last month or so, and we now have one room completely done - our master bedroom. Check it out in this video!

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Snow Slide

2007-03-03T18:33:00.000-08:00

We're popular! ;) Or at least, our house seem to be the target for every snowplow that goes down our street. Over the last month, a 6 foot mound of snow has accumulated on the right side of the driveway. What to do with such a monstrosity? Mark thinks, "build a slide!"

It's difficult to see (since the snow is all white), but there is a set of steps on the right, with the slide to the left. It's super fast in a sled, but the ride ends by crashing into a pile of snow a couple feet from the bottom of the slide. Not a favorite for the kids yet.

Abby would have stayed out for hours today, as usual. That girl loves snow!

Cute Kids Videos

2007-03-03T18:10:00.001-08:00

For all of you with kids out there - the Pocoyo series is so darn cute! Abby and Ethan love them.

Kids are funny

2007-03-03T18:02:00.000-08:00

Ethan: Look, Dad. I'm doing Criss-Cross-Appleseed!*

*he means, Criss-Cross-Applesauce, of course!

--------------------------------------------------------------------------------

Abby, singing: Tinkerbell, Tinkerbell, Tinker all the way. Oh what fun it is to ride in a one horse open sleigh - hey!

Mika Grace Kelly

2007-03-01T18:36:00.001-08:00

I LOVE this song and video. It makes me turn up the volume super loud and sing my lungs out.

And Ethan tells me, "I can be blue, Mom!"

[Artist: Mika. Song: Grace Kelly]

Sacrifices

2007-03-01T17:54:00.000-08:00

Everything in life involves sacrifices. If you want something to be done quickly and inexpensively, you sacrifice quality. If you choose to eat that double-decker cheeseburger, you sacrifice a little bit of your health. If you want to take an expensive vacation, you sacrifice some of the luxury items you would normally buy in order to save for it (Starbucks!)

I have been wondering lately what Mark and I would be willing to sacrifice if we were in a worse financial situation than we are, or if Mark was in a different type of job. We are so blessed to be in the position we are in, where I can comfortably stay home with the kids. Of course, a lot of hard work is behind that blessing, the work of a brilliant engineer who is my husband. But if Mark had a position that paid less, we would be faced with choosing which sacrifices to make.

My friend recently reminded me that she grew up in a home where her dad worked 2nd (or 3rd?) shift. The job was a conscious choice by her parents so that her mom could afford to be a stay-at-home mom. But the sacrifice was that she and her sister grew up being primarily raised by their mother, and her father was less involved in the day-to-day child rearing. She remembers taking family vacations without her dad, because his work wouldn't allow for him to go.

I was also talking to my sister about a family she knows where the mom and kids live here, and the dad lives in another state. He is living there for business, but flies back "home" on the weekends when he can. These kids don't see their dad on a day-to-day basis, either.

I don't know how those wives do it. I need Mark every day. Some days, I can barely make it to 4:25, when he arrives home. He is my rock, and my soft place. I rely on him for so much.

And I don't know how those kids do it, living in an environment absent of their dads for a vast majority of their time. Do they grow up to resent them? Are they as close to them as they would be in other circumstances?

And I really don't know how the dads do it, missing the tiny details of the kids growing up. Mark is sad if he is gone for a weekend, he feels like he's missed so much. What would it be like if that was your every-day reality?

I realize that it is easy for me to decide how I would react if our financial situation went south, because I'm not in that situation. But I really feel that I would rather live in an apartment and have Mark working a regular amount of hours, on a regular schedule, than to live in a mansion away from my husband. I would also rather live a less lavish lifestyle in order to allow Mark to be the hands-on dad that he is (by him choosing jobs that might pay less but would provide more freedom). And as far as staying home with the kids goes, I would sacrifice my stay-at-home status before I would sacrifice Mark's time with the kids. As Jenny and Jennifer have proven, being a working mom can be a perfectly good choice for everyone in the family.

So - what sacrifices would you make (or have you made) for the financial strength of your family? Were they good choices?

Tinkle Tinkle Little Star

2007-03-01T17:49:00.000-08:00

Abby is our little star. Like her brother, she has been wearing underwear all day for the past couple of weeks, with very few [peeing] accidents. Pooping is still a challenge for the potty, but we are using our marble-jar reward system to help with that. Thank goodness for Abby's progress, because I was ready to rip out my hair in frustration!

Now, to work on remembering to use toilet paper...

Weight Watchers, here I come

2007-03-01T17:47:00.000-08:00

[I'm walking up the stairs, with Ethan right behind]

Ethan: Mom!
Me: Yes, Eth?
Ethan: Me and Abby are little. And you are humongous.

Happy 32nd, Marky Doodle

2007-03-01T17:42:00.000-08:00

Mark turned 32 last weekend! Hard to believe, but true.
I love you with every part of me, Babe. 32 looks good on you!

Long time, no post

2007-03-01T17:39:00.000-08:00

I have been neglecting this blog lately, it is sad to say. I've also been neglecting e-mail and telephone calls. I've been in a frantic mode of DECORATING my stark white house. It's finally time to make this house a home by actually decorating (like, for starters, putting a nail into any wall and hanging something on it). I have grand visions for all of the rooms on the main level as well as our master suite. I will be posting pictures as soon as the rooms are completed.

To make up for my lack of posts, I will try to post several little snippit posts over the next few days.

"A" is for Amazing

2007-02-15T10:39:00.000-08:00

I am so very proud of Abby. She can write the letter "A"! Abby will be 3-1/2 in just a couple of weeks, and she has suddenly become interested in letters. She has been writing A's like crazy. She even signed her Valentines for school with her "A." She's so pleased with herself, and I'm so happy for her, too!

It's hard to see with light blue chalk, but here Abby has written a very nice A.

A closeup of Abby's A (circled to help you see it).

A really weird and bad memory

2007-02-09T10:12:00.000-08:00

Jennifer's post on names dredged up this memory for me.

When we moved into our first house, we were newlyweds of 1-1/2 years. The house wasn't much to look at, a simple 1000 square foot ranch on a decent sized lot. But it was ours, and we were happy to have it.

Over the 5 years we lived there, we were friendly with our neighbors to the south. Craig and Hildy were about our age, newlyweds as well, living in their equally-quaint starter home. We had many talks over the fence, we celebrated when they gave birth to their daughter Samantha, we held them in high regard.

When Samantha was around 18 months old, Hildy was pregnant again. At the time, Abby was just a few months old. We rejoiced for Craig and Hildy again. Soon after she became pregnant, Craig and Hildy decided that they would put their house for sale and move into a bigger home. We were sad that our neighbors would be moving, but knew we wouldn't be too far behind.

One day in April, Hildy came over to borrow a hairdryer. I asked her how the pregnancy was going, and she filled me in on how she was looking forward to the end of the summer when her baby was due. I asked if they knew the sex, and she told me that Samantha would have a little brother. They were excited to have a girl and a boy. We wrapped up the conversation, and Hildy left.

Ethan was born a month later. We hadn't really told anyone outside of our family about the possibility that we would be parents again in May, so it was a surprise to Craig and Hildy when we suddenly had a baby. One day, Mark saw that they were in the backyard and went outside to share the good news with them, we had a little boy and named him Ethan.

For the next couple weeks, Hildy avoided us. If we went out when she was out, she would immediately go inside. We thought it was strange, but had no idea what was going on so we dismissed it. Until one Friday afternoon in the middle of the summer.

I was loading the kids into the car to pick Mark up for a trip out of town. Hildy stormed out of the house.

"How could you do that, Trista??" she asked.

I was stunned, and asked what she was talking about.

"I never thought you would steal my name! You knew I was going to name this baby Ethan. I told you."

But the reality was, she hadn't told me. She said that she must have mentioned it when she came over to borrow the hair dryer. I know for a fact that she didn't mention it. Wouldn't I remember a thing like that - my neighbor telling me that her son would be Ethan while I was waiting for our own Ethan to be born?

No amount of my convincing changed her mind. I explained that we had chosen the name over a year before, before Abby was born. She was so sure that we had stolen her name, because nobody has even heard of Ethan, she said. I bit my tongue so that I wouldn't ask her what planet she was living on, since I know several Ethans. I tried to apologize(??) for the misunderstanding, but reassured her that I didn't intentionally take the same name she was going to use. She told me that it was a good thing that they were moving, or she would have to choose a different name. I bit my tongue so I wouldn't ask her what was wrong with her that she couldn't have a child with the same name as the neighbor - it's not like I'm her sister or anything! After 20 minutes of trying to reason with Hildy, I had to go tend to my screaming Ethan in the car and really had to pick Mark up to go out of town. She apprehensively told me that she believed me.

Hildy never spoke to me again. Craig confided in Mark that she was still upset about the name thing, even though it didn't really bother him. They moved away at the end of the summer. They didn't even say goodbye.

All of this over a name (which happened to rank #5 for boy names in 2004). It's really quite sad, don't you think?

Ethan in Natural Light

2007-02-03T17:09:00.000-08:00

All Ethan, all without flash. I love natural light.

Beautiful Girl

2007-02-03T17:00:00.000-08:00

My niece and Goddaughter, Breanna. What a beautiful, beautiful young woman. With a little sass and goofyness added for good measure.

It's Been One Week

2007-02-03T14:36:00.000-08:00

Seven full days of underwear for Mr. Ethan.

Zero day-time accidents. ZERO.

One night without accident as well.

We are DEFINITELY happy campers here!

The Giggle Gaggle

2007-01-29T17:32:00.000-08:00

These kids o' mine are hysterical. Lately, they will find a word that they think is funny and say it over and over again, cracking up the whole time. One day it was "zucchini". Earlier today was "sticky poop" (which actually is hilarious, isn't it??)

The word of this video is "Bobo". Enjoy!

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Two Days Accident Free

2007-01-29T17:08:00.001-08:00

Yes, Ethan has not had an accident in two days. Yesterday, the whole day was spent in his Superman undies from Aunt Bobbi and the gang. Today, he came home from preschool with a fever, and spent the day under the weather. Despite that, he still didn't wet his pants.

I'm so excited I could just bust!

One Year Later

2007-01-27T16:07:00.000-08:00

We have been potty training for a year now. Holy cow. Is that possible without going completely insane??

Potty training has been the most painful part of parenting so far. It seems that our schedule and conversation all revolves around the act of elimination. "Do you need to go potty?" "We'd better go potty before we leave..." "Abby pooped on the potty today! Good for her!" And so on. I'll be glad when bathroom activities are in the background again.

I reread my first post on potty training from one year ago. January 11th, 2006. I sound so hopeful in this post. Carefree, really, imagining being diaper free in the near future, yet remaining a little melancholy about my children moving on to another stage in life.

Please, kids, move on to another stage.

I even asked for some guesses about when we'd be diaper-free during the daytime. I laughed at my father-in-law, who dared to imagine August 31st as the date. Look at us, January 27th, 2007, not diaper-free.

I even posted some updates on our potty progress. The tone of them gets more and more annoyed as time goes on.

A year later, Abby is back to the same stage she was at one year ago (dry much of the day, with about 2 accidents a day). In the past year, she has gone through stages of being completely potty trained, reverted back to never using the potty, and has slowly built back up to where we are now. I can see the light at the end of the tunnel, though, because she has more interest in being a "big girl" now.

And the potty situation of January 2007 bears some good news (of course, posting this will ruin it all, but oh well). Ethan *might be* trained. Over the last three days, he has had 2 accidents (both of them while he was wearing Pull-Ups, not underwear). Today was accident-free. He tells us when he has to go, and he really goes when he says he will. He doesn't want to have accidents, and he's proud of himself for staying dry. He will go potty anywhere, and is excited to go #2 more than any other kid we've seen. Yippee!!

Tomorrow, with Ethan, we are trying an underwear-all-day experiment. No Pull-Up for church or breakfast, no Pull-Up if we go out shopping, etc. If we have success, Ethan gets to choose some new underwear as a reward ("Lightning McQueen, maybe, Mom??") I'm pretty confident that my son will get his new undies. Maybe his sister will jump on board that bandwagon, too. ;)

The First Post to Offend: Crunchy-Granola

2007-01-26T19:04:00.000-08:00

I am a member of Generation X, which is unique in my family. My sisters are all Baby Boomers, a generation that has its own generalizations and stereotypes. But I belong to Generation X, probably noted for a sense of entitlement, inability to save any money and a "disposable" attitude.

Generation X seems to have created its own movement in parenting, hence the birth of the Crunchy-Granola Mom.

My oldest sister has no idea what crunchy moms are. A crunchy mom when my sister was 30 would have been a rarity. Today, crunchiness is everywhere.

Crunchy-granola at its most general describes a movement to parent "naturally," or "earthy" parenting. There are many areas of parenting that can be crunch-i-fied, such as:

Circumcision (crunchy = no way!)
Home birth (crunchy = hell yeah!)
C-section (crunchy = only after 1,000 hours of labor!)
Pain-medicated birth (crunchy = you better not!)
Diapers/menstrual pads (crunchy = cloth!)
Natural Family Planning (crunchy = know your body!)
Breastfeeding/tandem nursing/child weans itself (crunchy = of course!)
Co-sleeping with baby (crunchy = move over, hubby, here comes baby!)
"Wearing" your baby in a sling (crunchy = how better to "attachment parent"?)
Organic foods/mostly vegetarian diet (crunchy = buy from your local organic grower!)
Modern medicine (crunchy = herbal remedies, please!)
Vaccinations (crunchy = turn 'em down at the pediatrician!)
Home school (crunchy = 1+1 equals 2, Johnny!)
Positive discipline (crunchy = whoever gives their child a time out deserves a spanking!)
TV usage (crunchy = turn it off!)

Way back when, upon my first dreams of being pregnant, Mark and I started reading parenting books. We are definitely ones to do our research, you know. Through my reading, I tentatively decided that I was going to be a water-birthing, breastfeeding, possibly co-sleeping, cloth diapering, non-circumcising, sling-wearing Mom. I would make my own baby food (not organic, but home made). And we were already practicing Natural Family Planning, so mark me as a yes in that category.

Things change.

I never gave birth (scratch out water-birthing).

Breastfeeding didn't work out (attempted, but ultimately failed).

"The family bed" was ruled out quickly when Abby's basinette was in our room, and none of us were getting any sleep (and we decided our bed was a marital bed, thank you very much).

I did cloth diaper. Abby wore cloth for about 1 year, and Ethan for about 3 months. Until I couldn't stand changing the clothing/bedding/diapers of my heavy-wetting son 10 times a day while we were trying to sell our house. And so I stopped. I chose cloth for 3 reasons: making a contribution to help the environment, keeping the disposable-diaper chemicals away from my baby's skin, and saving money (which we did ... oodles for the first year).

Ethan was circumcised, because we didn't have a choice in the matter (it was very important to the birthparents that he be circumcised). We wouldn't have chosen that. If we have the choice for a future son, however, he will be part of a matched set with Daddy and brother.

I have two slings, and they got TONS of use with my babies. I carried them a lot... but wasn't tied to that. If I wanted to put them down, I did. Even if there was crying involved.

I did make home made baby food for Abby until she was old enough for table foods. I made one batch of carrots for Ethan, and then realized that I was a mom of a very-active toddler and an infant, and I didn't have time for this stuff!

Overall, my crunchy-factor is pretty low. I like the idea of a lot of it, but sometimes convenience wins out. Also, I think my children need to be more independent than crunchy parenting promotes. And, frankly, the crunchy-granola movement is a little too intense for me. As a group, the crunchy moms are very vocal about what is the right way to birth or to parent. Maybe they're on the defensive so often that they feel the need to be so strong. Or maybe they are the forerunners of their movement and want to get a good running start. I'm not sure, but it makes me a little sad that the hippie-like moms seem so uptight.

It especially makes me sad that a perfectly awesome mom like Jennifer feels so badly because her birth experience didn't meet the crunchy standard that she feels guilty about it 2 years later. Now that's a cryin' shame.

That wacky blog thing

2007-01-24T18:28:00.000-08:00

I haven't been writing in my blog lately. My posts have been lame, at best. I'm not happy with the content of what I've been hitting the "publish" button on.

I am disappointed that my posts are like milk toast: bland and ineffectual. I have much more to write about the darker side of my life (read: more interesting), but I am doing a lot of self-editing. Most of that is because there are a wide variety of people that read this blog, people whom I don't want to offend by writing with conviction. Most of my readership is people I know (most are related, in fact), people whom I see in person. People who probably don't want to know about the underbelly of Trista.

I'm not sure what to do. I've toyed with just writing what I feel and ignoring the fact that I know so many of you IRL ("in real life", for you internet newbies). I've toyed with the idea of starting an additional blog which would be completely anonymous, and all my readers would be strangers. I've toyed with making this a "kid update only" blog to share details about the two most interesting members of Team Meat. I've toyed with stopping the blog.

I'm still puzzling. I'm not happy internally with my recent writing here, and have chosen not to write several compelling posts over the last month or so because of self-editing. I guess I'll see how I feel about it as time goes on, to see which course of action I will take.

Jail Cell

2007-01-24T10:23:00.000-08:00

Last night, Mark and I reluctantly converted Abby's room to the likes of a jail cell. Only the basic necessities are allowed.

A bed, a desk with completely empty drawers, a closet void of even clothing. Not a single toy brings joy to this room. It is all about function. And all about avoiding distraction for naps and bedtime.

My daughter is 3 going on 13 in so many ways. But despite that, she desperately needs her naps. She is not a "happy" child when she is sleep-deprived. I was sad when we started tying her door shut at times when we couldn't be right there to monitor her safety. And now, I'm sorry that we have had to resort to converting her room into a jail cell. But everyone in this family benefits when Abby takes a good nap and wakes up cheerful. Let's hope this works.

Cheese-a-saurus Trista: Recipe 1

2007-01-14T19:04:00.000-08:00

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I made my first exotic cheese recipe this week (if you have no idea what I'm talking about, read here). I made a macaroni and cheese recipe that I stole from a hospital magazine. But instead of using Gruyere cheese (which apparently my grocery store does not carry), I substituted Jarlsberg cheese. The recipe also calls for cheddar cheese.

I have another mac and cheese recipe from my Mom that I like. But that recipe only calls for cheddar cheese (I use extra sharp), and it thickens quite a bit. The new mac and cheese was definitely creamier tasting, lighter, and saucier. It was a hit for all four of us! Ethan and Abby gave it two thumbs up.

I will keep this recipe as an alternative to my tried and true macaroni and cheese. If you would like the recipe, please e-mail and I will get it to you.

Catching Up

2007-01-14T18:24:00.000-08:00

I really, really enjoyed Advent this year. It was the most relaxing Advent I've ever had. I evaluated which activities were important and which I could let go. And I let go. I said no to a cookie exchange. My Christmas decorations were minimal. We even opted to see Santa at our church one Sunday instead of heading to the mall (which meant that we missed the photo session). I bought most of the gifts on-line or purchased gift cards. It felt good to take care of myself (and take care of my family) by remaining fairly stress-free this year.

Despite turning down some extra things that could have been fun, the Christmas season was so joyful for us. We celebrated so many traditions, some new and some old. We spent lots of time as a family, which was my only wish for this year. And we kept the season Holy. It lead to lots of reflection on what role Christ has in my life. It lead to lots of affirmation that our kids are starting to "get it," understanding that Jesus was a special baby that was born under very special circumstances. I have no doubt that our kids will grow in faith each year as we celebrate Advent as a family. We're doing a good job as parents in raising them in our faith.

But peace doesn't come without price. Such a relaxing December means a very busy January. I'm finally getting to a point since December 1st where I feel like I'm catching up. I'm catching up on the cleaning (just last week, I did a happy dance because I was caught up on laundry for the first time since December 1st. And, I actually washed all of the bathroom sinks in the house for the first time in a few weeks.). I am catching up on the organizing (the store room and garage require hours of sorting, purging, consolidating now that the basement is finished and the stuff has somewhere to go). I am catching up on the committee work I'm involved in (my family reunion this summer -and- the nursery renovation committee at my church). And I am catching up on the scrapbooking I need to do (haha - I'm still 9 months behind - this is one area that will NEVER be caught up).

I never feel quite right unless I feel things are "enough" in order (which varies with me from time to time, but I always know when I get there). I'm beginning to feel that things will be close enough soon. And then, hopefully, I can start sleeping better, my eyelid will stop twitching, and my neckaches will go away. All my symptoms of stress will melt away and I'll return to the way I felt in December, relaxed and at peace.

I miss December.

My Blanket is Crooked

2007-01-03T17:33:00.000-08:00

In the recent past, Ethan has become the king of delaying bedtime. And he's been waking in the middle of the night a lot lately. He gets very creative with his list of excuses. It's driving us batty.

So far tonight, we've heard:

I want water
I need to go potty
There's a monster in my room
My p3nis hurts
My shirt is scratchy
My ear has water in it (an excuse from last night that got him an extra few minutes)
My tummy hurts
I can't find a page in my book (we didn't actually put him to bed with any books)

and my personal favorite,

My blanket is crooked

Calgon, take me away.

Ahh.. The Power of Cheese

2007-01-02T17:33:00.000-08:00

Anyone close to me knows my most favorite of all foods is cheese. It's a huge weakness for me.

While waiting for Mark after his surgery, I found a new macaroni and cheese recipe in a magazine. I promptly ripped the page out of the magazine (yes, I'm the person that actually does that if the need arises). The recipe calls for cheddar and Gruyere cheese. Now, I'm not a cheese connaisseur, really, I love most of the cheeses I've tried, but I'm not one to spend $5 for a small piece of some exotic cheese just to have it in the house. Cheddar, cojack, swiss - these are our staples. So of course, I had no idea what Gruyere cheese looked like or would be found at my local supermarket. After hunting for 15 minutes in the fine cheese area, with no employees anywhere to be found, I gave up.

I looked it up on the internet when I got home. Apparently, Gruyere is a hard white cheese, complex in flavor with nutty, earthy flavors that hint at fruit flavors. OK. Whatever. Apparently, it's great for melting (which is probably why it is in macaroni and cheese). I will try again at the supermarket, hopefully being victorious this next time.

And it made me think. There are lots of cheeses I haven't tried, despite my infatuation. I can hardly claim to have a love of all things cheese-related if I haven't actually tried all the cheeses, can I? So I am hereby challenging myself to make one recipe a week using a different cheese for the year 2007.

I know, it sounds cheesy.

And it is.

Update on the appendix-less man

2006-12-29T17:32:00.000-08:00

Mark was released from the hospital at lunchtime today (his surgery was at 11 pm yesterday, so we were happy to be released so early). He's taking Tylenol and the dreaded Vicadin for his pain, without negative side effects. He's sore, and has been sleeping a lot, and seems to be feeling a bit better tonight than he was earlier today.

The surgeon said his appendix was twice its normal size, but it was in a very favorable position for surgery and the incision was smaller than anticipated (about 1-1/2 inches, I would say). The appendix hadn't burst, which made for an easier surgery and much easier recovery. Mark can take off the bandage and shower normally starting tomorrow. He has been restricted to no heavy lifting (meaning, no lifting of children) for 2 weeks. It will be a rough couple of weeks for the whole family, that's for sure. But I'm so glad Mark is on the mend!

Mark was one of 7 patients with appendicitis yesterday. The nurse wasn't sure if it was a record or not, but it was certainly out of the norm. Is there something in the water? I think maybe I should start drinking Evian.

Mark's Record Is Broken

2006-12-28T22:56:00.000-08:00

Mark has never broken a bone.
Mark has never gotten stitches.
Mark has never had surgery.
Er, wait.
That last one is no longer true.

It is 2:00 a.m., and I am writing to report that Mark has joined his brother Rob and our friend Erik and is now appendix-less. He had an attack of the "stomach flu" last night that lasted through the morning and the pain just wouldn't go away. And suddenly, the pain was just in one spot on the right side of his abdomin. The surgeon said it couldn't have been a more textbook case of appendicitis if Mark had tried.

So we spent the day at the hospital while our kids were under the care of another mom from my babysitting co-op, Laura, and then Mark's parents, who are flying out of town at 9:00 tomorrow morning and just left my house a few minutes ago (all of them saints, I tell you.) Tomorrow morning, since my parents and my sisters' family are all out of the state on vacation, I will drop the kids off with Mark's Aunt Linda (yet another saint) so that I can be with him at the hospital. It's amazing how much scheduling there is when someone is sick.

Mark didn't say anything too funny coming off of anesthesia, but apparently he did try to climb off the stretcher in the recovery room, telling them, "I'm going home!" [He doesn't remember saying that.] He said that he had dreams about Abby and Ethan dancing and giggling when he was in surgery, which is a very pleasant thing to dream.

It's never dull around here, is it?

Good night.

A Never-Before-Seen Performance

2006-12-26T10:48:00.000-08:00

Ethan (er, rather, KiKi Witch) will now perform for you using his new karaoke machine from Grandma and Grandpa. Enjoy!

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Happy Christmas Eve

2006-12-24T10:12:00.000-08:00

I am currently listening to Abby belt out "Twinkle, Twinkle, Little Star" over and over in her room while she is *supposed to be* taking a nap. It's hard to be frustrated when she's so darn jolly!

We spent our morning opening presents from my sister Bobbi's family, and then of course playing with them. It is a leisurely day so far, to be followed by a festive night with my parents coming over to celebrate Christmas with us. This evening, I will be singing in the church choir for our 11:00 p.m. Mass (joining the Christmas choir was one of the fun highlights of my advent this year). It should turn out to be a great day!

I am really looking forward to tomorrow. We are going to bake cookies this afternoon for Santa. We will also sing Happy Birthday to Jesus, which Ethan has been singing already for the past month. The kids will come downstairs to open 5 gifts each plus a stocking that Santa will bring. We will spread out the gifts over the morning, and later on Mark's parents will come over for brunch and another round of presents. After that, we're off to Mark's mom's extended family.

It should be a really fun couple of days! This is such a magical time of year!!

Christmas Traditions

2006-12-21T04:32:00.000-08:00

As we raise our children, Mark and I are developing lots of family traditions. It is really important to us that the kids have certain things that they can count on year after year. It is really important for all of us. Christmas seems to be a time of many traditions.

Here are some of the *new* and *existing* Christmas traditions that the Team Meat family observes.

Hand tree *new*: When we had our basement-reveal party, I asked everyone in our family to help make a Christmas tree for our new basement. We all made a hand-print to help create the tree in the photo. I labeled all the hands. I love the way it turned out. I would like to do this every year, and keep the trees from past years and hang them all up. I will either complete the tree at Thanksgiving, or maybe I'll host a small party at the beginning of December "just because".

Cutting our Christmas tree *existing*: I believe that my parents have always had a real Christmas tree that our family cut each year. They still do. And so do we! We make the cutting of the tree an adventure, and the last few years we have started the tradition of going with Mark's parents. I just love choosing the perfect tree!!

Gammers and Grampa *new*: My parents bought a couple extra gifts for the kids this year, and decided to give them away at the beginning of December. So they came over one afternoon to play with the kids, gave them their cool dressup clothes and a couple Christmas books, and we had dinner together. It was a really great relaxing start of the Christmas season. We're planning to do it again next year.

5 Days of Christmas *existing*: When Mark and I were first married, we were living 2-1/2 hours away from our families. This meant lots of weekend trips home. And it meant that Christmas Eve and Christmas day were spent away from our own house. We didn't want to haul our gifts to each other across the state in order to open them on Christmas Eve or Christmas day. So we developed a "5 days of Christmas" tradition. We would package our gifts to each other in 5 chunks, and sit down with the Christmas tree all lit up to open one each night prior to leaving town. It spread Christmas out for us, and gave us something to look forward to each day of Christmas week. And we usually write clues on the tags so we can try to guess what the gifts are each night, too. Even though we are home for Christmas now, we still do this...we just wait until the kids are in bed. ;)

Christmas card picture *existing*: Since my oldest sister Becky was born, my parents have included a photo in with their Christmas cards. They were always a full-family photo, including my parents, and the photo shoot was always an event. While I didn't always enjoy the photo shoots (there is one year when I was about 8 where I was crying in most of the pictures), it is an awesome tradition and is so fun to look back on. Now, we receive a card from my empty-nester parents each year with a picture of the two of them. I have always loved the tradition, and ever since Mark and I were engaged, we have sent out Christmas cards with photos. Up until 2 years ago, even the pets were included (now, it is just too crazy to try and set up a shot with 4 people, 2 dogs and a cat).

Advent tree *new*: This year, Christmas is so exciting for the kids. I wanted to count down to Jesus' birthday with an advent calendar. Mark's mom gave me a cute advent calendar from his childhood, but it seemed a little too fragile for preschool hands. So Mark bought this advent tree from Starbucks, of all places. It has drawers that pull out, and you turn the drawers around as the month progresses to create a winter scene. The drawers came with chocolates, but in the future I will find small trinkets to represent different parts of the story of Jesus' birth. The kids love the tree.

Gift for Jesus *new*: Mark and I love all of the activities surrounding Christmas, but we definitely want our kids to understand that what we are doing is celebrating the birth of our Savior. So I came up with the idea to purchase a toy as a family to give to a child who could use one through Toys for Tots. In the future, I would like the kids to pitch in some of their saved money to help buy the toy. I want to stress that as we celebrate Jesus' birthday, we should give Him the gift that he asked for, to help take care of those in need. We tried this activity this year. We learned a valuable lesson, the hard way: our kids are too young for this concept right now. The endeavor was not well understood, and resulted in a 3-year old screaming as we left Target because she thought we were at the store to pick out a toy to reward her for doing well on the potty. Bad, bad parenting mistake. Next year, we might be ready.

What are some of your Christmas traditions?

One of these days

2006-12-15T20:17:00.000-08:00

But not today. I have a few posts rolling around in my head, but haven't had (or rather, haven't made) the time to write them.

I am taking my own personal mantra to "enjoy this Advent season to its fullest" to heart. I have said no to some commitments that were causing me stress. And I feel darn good about it. Unfortunately, blog-time is one of the things that is on the back burner for the time. I hope to write something very soon - stay tuned!

Our Bee-u-tiful Basement!

2006-12-12T10:23:00.000-08:00

As promised, here is the Virtual Grand Reveal of our finished basement! There are a few things that need to be done yet (some wiring of the outlets, for instance) but we are able to play downstairs now! I AM SO HAPPY!! My husband and Dad-in-law have given me such a gift by adding living space!

Before the carpeting was laid, I asked Mark to sign the floor for future homeowners to find some day when we are gone...
Here is the trip down the stairs...
The view of the rec. room from the bottom of the stairs...
There is a little niche that was perfect for a dressup area (the mirrors will be mounted on the right-hand wall very soon)...
I saw this idea somewhere for putting up a clothesline to hang artwork, and I loved it. So the wall at the bottom of the stairs holds my kiddo's artwork (and all at their level so they can see it, too)...
This is the "reading nook." We'll also do puzzles, arts and crafts, and other stuff in this corner. Eventually, I think the kids would really like bean bags in this area too...
I bought 3 big bookcases at a garage sale this summer for $1 each. They were really junky. But after a few coats of paint, and a lot of structural reinforcement by Mark, they turned out well! We attached two of them together to hold all of our storage bins of stuff. It's hard to tell, but each shelf is a different color (light green, dark blue, dark green, light blue)...
I am so happy to have a "conversation area" now. Across from this chair and couch are a pair of chairs. The couch pulls out to a bed, also, for any overnight guests we may have. I haven't figured out what I'm going to do with the support pole behind Sawyer yet, but I'm thinking I might cover it with fabric...
This is the office, which can be easily converted to a bathroom in the future (see the plumbing hookup on the floor?) Mark is anxious to get our two computer desks and 4 computers set up down there!
This is the view of the office from the main room. I just really like the artistic look of the striped pattern through the circle pattern of the outer room.
There are three other rooms in the basement. There is a store room (which is jam-packed with stuff and needs to be sorted out soon), and two closets (one holds the sump pump and the other has the circuit breaker and will hold all of my scrapbooking supplies). The basement is gorgeous! Come by and see it in person, if you can!!!!

Preview of coming attractions

2006-12-11T10:21:00.000-08:00

Tonight, we are hosting a gala event to celebrate a momentous occasion in the Team Meat house. We are finally moved in to our newly finished basement!! Our family and neighbors will be coming over for the Grand Reveal. No one has seen it in its finished state except the four of us, and I can hardly wait to show it off!

The kids got their own sneak peek yesterday, after not seeing the basement in well over 6 months. The first thing Ethan said? "Wow... real carpet!"

We have been playing down there every spare minute today, and will be doing the same right up to the party, I'm sure. Be on the lookout for photos of our awesome new living space!

Our Resident Dr. Dolittle

2006-12-04T13:38:00.000-08:00

Abby has always had a special way with animals. Since she was a teeny-tiny thing (some could argue that she still is a teeny-tiny thing), she has never had fear of any animal, big or small. It is easy to see that love pours from her to any animals. It really is amazing and beautiful.

Yesterday, on our Christmas tree cutting adventure, we took a wagon ride from the parking lot to the tree farm. The wagon was pulled by a team of horses, beautiful mammoth Clydesdales.

As I mentioned before, it was really cold yesterday. And very icy. Our wagon was being pulled by three horses on the way back to the barn. When we were almost to the barn, a pregnant horse named Mamie lost her footing on the ice and fell down sideways. The other horses had to do a quick two-step to keep their own footing.

The time that Mamie was down was small, but it had a big impact on a little girl with a giant heart. Her eyes were as big as saucers, and she kept asking me if the horse was OK. After I mumbled some reassurances, she dropped it for the moment.

Over hot chocolate, she brought it up again.

After her nap, she mentioned it again.

Today, she has brought it up several times. Not to ask me how Mamie is, but rather recalling the events. "The horse slipped. Fell down and got hurt," she would say, as she furrowed her brow.

I know this is eating at my animal-empathic daughter. I just hope she can find her own peace with the incident. And I now know that when our pets' time on earth is through, as much as we will all grieve, there is one girl in our family who will be hit the hardest.

Mamie is on the far right. Beautiful horses!

Oh, Super-tall Christmas Tree

2006-12-03T18:26:00.000-08:00

We spent the afternoon with Grandma and Grandpa on our annual trip to cut our Christmas trees. It was really, really cold. But it was beautifully snowy, with big fat flakes that you can catch on your tongue. The perfect day for tradition.

Getting ready to go...

The tallest tree we've ever had. It will fit nicely in the two-story foyer!

Brrrr.... we need our hot chocolate!!

Waiting for Grandma and Grandpa

2006-12-03T11:52:00.000-08:00

The Weather Outside is Snowful

2006-12-02T20:07:00.000-08:00

Yesterday, we had an ice storm, followed by a few inches of snow. Schools were closed, Mark worked from home, it was kinda fun.

After dinner, Mark went out to shovel the driveway, which meant that we all went out. The kids put on their snowpants, boots, hats, mittens, coats. As soon as Ethan got down the front steps, he plopped himself on his back and made a snow angel (which he has been wanting to do for a month now). Abby had a blast throwing loosely-packed snowballs at everyone. The kids got to help Daddy uing their "shovels" (which are really Chuck It tennis-ball launchers used for the dogs - but they also work really well at chucking snowballs at your unsuspecting husband from the neighbor's yard). Everyone had fun, even Dad who was stuck actually shoveling.

Ethan cried when it was time to come in after 45 minutes (when the sun had set and we were still outside throwing snowballs in the dark with our neighbors). The kids are going to LOVE playing outside this year.

November 30th - The End of NaBloPoMo

2006-11-30T19:41:00.000-08:00

So it's 10:42 pm on the last day of the month. I'm sitting in front of a finger-printed monitor, trying to find inspiration for my last post of National Blog Posting Month.

I should have had a plan. I should have had my grand finale chosen on November 1st, with each post working up to some awesome piece of writing I saved for last. The icing on the cake.

But I didn't, and so I sit, staring at the computer screen. I just read Mark's final post (the post about me), and now I feel like even more of a loser. A loser with no plan.

So, I will take this moment to thank you, my readers. The members of my family. My friends. My acquaintances. My friends-through-other-friends. My strangers who might stop by to see what's up. I've enjoyed writing for this last month. There was some good, some funny, some hilarious, some poignant, and some just plain stupid. I hope you could all see a snapshot of the life of a wife and mother who is scrambling to run a household and is happy to just keep everyone alive here. Including the pets. I've enjoyed writing every day, and would like to write more often than I have in the past.

So look for more posts on raising a Spirited Daughter, more posts about preparing for the holidays, more posts on the hilarious or touching things the kids say.

And when you find them, be sure to send me the link.

November 29th - It's beginning to look a lot like Christmas

2006-11-29T19:28:00.000-08:00

I just finished designing my Christmas cards tonight. And, might I add, they rock.

We received our first card in the mail today from Jenny's family. That girl is always so darn on top of everything - good thing my competitive nature forces me to get my cards out soon in order to keep up. ;)

I am doing well on my Christmas shopping, although I'm not sure Friday is a realistic goal. I might be finishing up this weekend.

We might get our tree this weekend, too. Or maybe the weekend after.

Don't you just love the Christmas season??

November 28th - Miscellaneous Thoughts

2006-11-28T17:33:00.000-08:00

My scrapbooking weekend (two weekends ago) was great! My Mom, my sisters Becky and Bobbi, my nieces Kelsey, Bree, Courtney and Breanna, my great friend Jenny and Bree's friend Victoria all accompanied me. We got too little sleep but had so much fun. We held 4 or 5 different challenges throughout the weekend (i.e. "use stamps on a page" or "create a pocket on your page" etc.) It was really nice, and the store that hosted us was especially hospitable. I hope we can return there next year!
I got a call today from the vet reminding me that Sawyer's castration is scheduled for tomorrow. Couldn't they just say "neuter?" Do I really need to think of it that way??
Speaking of the cat-that-has-moved-in, he has not peed outside of the litter box since "the incident." Woohoo! And it appears that the odor is mostly gone. We have an odor-eliminating product that a friend gave us to try this week. With a little luck, the problem will be a bad memory soon!
Speaking more of that crazy cat, I have learned a lot about owning a cat in the last month.

This cat is LOUD. He mews about everything. And he sounds just like Abby when he's crying in the middle of the night. We have been fooled many times.
Cats are night animals (duh). He sleeps and sleeps all day, and then goes ballistic after the kids go to bed. He wakes us up many nights with his crazy running around in our bathroom or the foyer downstairs. The poor dogs.
Sawyer insists on sitting in my lap when I'm working on the computer. He won't take no for an answer. At least with the dogs, they will just stare at you until you do what they want - they aren't laying in your lap against your will. Oh yeah, they do that too.
Cats are fussy eaters. The dogs will eat anything. Literally. And they will eat it quickly, no matter what it is. Sawyer has to sniff his food from every angle before deciding if he wants to take a bite of it. He never eats all of the food in the bowl, but meows for more when there are 10 or so pieces left. He won't drink water that's not fresh (but will drink out of the dogs' water bowl, which is much more foul than water that has been sitting out for a few hours).

Abby has been hit-or-miss on naps since her 3rd birthday. This week has been great for naps. In fact, today (for the second day in a row), she actually tucked herself into bed while I put Ethan down for his nap and just waited for her kiss goodnight. If only it was always that easy!
Mark and I have been like two ships passing in the night for the last month or so. During our free time, one of us is usually watching the kids while the other is doing some kid-free activity (working on the basement, attending a meeting, etc.) We are in serious need of a weekend away for just the two of us. I am hoping that we can plan a trip to Chicago for January or February. With effective scheduling, my sister's family can watch Abby and Ethan for us. Just imagining time alone to reconnect makes me giddy!
There are two families of kids that attend our preschool who are in need of help right now, because both moms have just had some very serious and major surgeries. The rest of the families (including us) have come together to provide playdates, meals and house cleaning services. Have I mentioned how happy I am with this preschool, and how proud I am to be part of their community???
Isn't this the cutest thing you've ever seen?

November 27th - Who's that?

2006-11-27T19:40:00.000-08:00

This morning, Abby was poring over one of her favorite books. It is a book of bible stories, but it is aimed at a much older child. The drawings are anything but cartoony, and the stories are not the cheery "Noah's ark" stories of our children's bible. The stories tell of people dying, famine, God's wrath, etc. But Abby won't listen to the stories anyway, so it doesn't really matter... Abby loves to look at the pictures in the book.

Today, she kept looking at drawings of a white-robed, long-haired, bearded adult Jesus healing the sick, talking to the masses, praying.

"Who's that?" she'd ask on each page.
"That's Jesus," I'd reply.
She wasn't convinced.

"No, Mommy. That's Daddy."

Maybe she has realized that like Jesus, Daddy performs his own miracles around here. Or maybe Daddy just needs to shave and get some more fashionable clothes.

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Ethan watched Toy Story today, for the millionth time. When the movie would get to a scene with Andy's evil neighbor boy, he would turn to me and ask, "who's that, Mom?"

"That's Sid," I would explain.
"Sin?"
"No, Sid."

At the end of the movie, he announced, "I don't like Sin!"

Thank goodness for that. That will make my life as his Mom much easier.

November 26th - Schooling

2006-11-26T19:00:00.000-08:00

I just finished an episode of Dr. Phil that aired this past Friday. The topic: schooling options. The discussions included traditional schooling, home schooling and "unschooling."

From what I understood from the show, unschooling is similar to home schooling but without a curriculum. It is "child-lead learning." The child experiences learning by experiencing life. The child isn't taught in a traditional way, with his parent or another adult being the teacher. The child is exposed to many different experiences, and through that exposure gains education.

Home schooling is a well-known alternative to traditional schooling. The parent acts as teacher of the child, and the child isn't taught in a public forum but instead is taught at home (I do realize that many home school families try to share teaching resources and the parent may teach a certain subject to more home schoolers than just their own children).

Traditional schools are what Mark and I both experienced growing up. And, of course, even traditional schooling has many alternatives today. Public, private, charter, Montessori, and other types of schools are all options. The commonality is that kids are taught in a classroom setting with other children.

Schooling is just one of the many "hot buttons" of the parents of our generation. I personally know people who are choosing every type of schooling mentioned (except unschooling - that one was new to me). Everyone seems very passionate about their choices. Of course, we are no exception.

Our children will be schooled in the public school system. In fact, the school system was a big factor in choosing the location of our home. We have a lot of information about the system. We both attended the public schools for our entire education. Mark's mom is a teacher at one of the elementary schools. My sister's children have all attended the same system for all of their educations (and have all gone through the same elementary school where Abby and Ethan will attend). Mark and I are very comfortable with the education we received, and felt very prepared for college.

It is important to me that my kids experience all that the public school can offer. From the ride to school on the bus to the extremely diverse population which is enrolled in our public school system, our kids will be preparing for "the real world" that awaits them when they graduate. And the system provides a challenging education as well.

I won't go into the reasons that home schooling, unschooling, or any of the other traditional schooling options are not our first choice. I respect other parents' right to choose what they feel is best for their children without criticism. I just feel strongly that as of right now, the public school system that our kids will attend is our best option to educate our two precious children.

November 25th - 'Twas The Month Before Christmas

2006-11-25T18:08:00.000-08:00

Ah, the Christmas season is here.

Time for Christmas music (love it!)
and Christmas tree chopping (love it!)
and Christmas lights (love it!)
and Christmas decorations (love it!)
and Advent (love it!)
and Christmas parties (love it!)
and Christmas food (love it!)

and Christmas shopping (chirp, chirp)

I don't love the shopping so much.

I love the picking out of the gifts
but I don't love the driving around (hate it!)
and wrapping (hate it!)
and shipping (hate it most of all!)

I have deemed this the year of the cyber-gift -or- the year of the gift card. Whenever possible, I am ordering online or buying a gift card and calling it done.

I have already gone online and purchased Christmas gifts for all of our nieces and nephews in Florida. I paid for wrapping. And they will be shipped directly to their houses. No trips to the post office for me, no sirree! Such a relief!!

My older nieces and nephews are either going to provide me with a specific item to purchase (online, of course, to be shipped directly to their house) or they will be getting a gift card to their favorite store (which is presumably what most teenagers really want, anyway). I am not going to stress out about gift-buying this year. And I WILL be done shopping by December first, come heck or high water. ;)

This year, Advent will be mine to enjoy sipping hot cider or cocoa after playing in the snow with the kids, or singing carols by the fire, or lazily decorating the Christmas tree. The thought of it makes me grin from ear to ear!

Merry Christmas season to all, and to all a good night!!

November 24th - Cooperation

2006-11-24T20:10:00.000-08:00

Today, over breakfast at Panera Bread, Abby and Ethan were fighting over a muffin.

Abby: Don't touch!
Ethan: It's mine!
Abby: Leave me 'lone!
Ethan: My muffin!

Mommy: I don't like the way you're yelling at each other. Can't we have some cooperation?

Ethan: Yeah, Abby. Let's have some craperation.

November 23rd - Giving Thanks

2006-11-23T09:56:00.000-08:00

Happy Turkey Day, Everyone!

Today is a day of being thankful for all that we have. We are so blessed to have what we do.

I am especially thankful for the gift of Mark. When we had been dating about 6 months, I was already certain that he was the one I wanted to marry. I knew we were right together because I liked myself so much better when I was with him. He has always inspired me to be my best. He has always been my calm rock when waves were threatening to tip me over. He encourages and challenges me, keeps me in check and gives me wings.

I am very proud of who Mark is becoming. He is undergoing some transformations within himself that I am overjoyed to witness. He has stepped out of his comfort zone so many times in the last year, challenging himself to try things that are outside of his box. He has taught a Faith Formation class at church (that he himself volunteered for without being asked). He has given a lengthy presentation at a software conference. He is pursuing an opportunity to start a business with a long-time friend and colleague. He is stepping up and saying "no!" at work when he needs to. He always presents himself as confident and intelligent, and gains respect. He is maintaining a good relationship with his brother, despite being 1500 apart. He is making a new mark on the world (or Mark on the world -heehee), and I'm so proud.

Mark and I have been together for 12 years this weekend, which is over a third of my life. I honestly don't know what I would be like without Mark since he is such an integral part of who I have become. So today, as on all days, I thank God for the gift of Mark in my life.

November 22nd - My Spirited Daughter: Part 4 (Persistence)

2006-11-22T12:01:00.000-08:00

Persistence: Abby can do it by herself, Papa.

In the book I've been reading (Raising Your Spirited Child by Mary Sheedy Kurcinka), the spirited child is described as being more: more intense, sensitive, perceptive, persistent and energetic than other children.

The second trait talked about in the book is persistence. Spirited children need, want and seek power. Persistent children are determined and strong. They push where other kids don't . They never give up. It is nearly impossible to ignore them or distract them.

How it relates to Abby: Abby's persistence is her strongest spirited trait. She can lock in for battle over anything. If she wants to climb the couch, and has been told not to climb the couch, she will do anything she can to find a way to climb the couch. She challenges every rule. Her will is very strong.

Abby is also incredibly motivated to accomplish things. She never asks for help before she has exhausted all possibilities of completing something herself. She accepts any challenge with glee. She has learned so many things in her short life by using her persistent nature.

How we can manage Abby's persistence: A major key to successful parenting of a persistent child is choosing battles. With Abby, everything could be a battle if we let it. Mark is much better at choosing the important battles, while I have had to work hard to identify which battles are worth fighting (absolutely no running into the street, prayer time is special time we need to take seriously, aggression is never tolerated), which battles can be negotiated (how much/what kinds of food Abby eats, can Abby sleep in a sleeping bag on the floor or only in her bed, can Abby take off her shoes and coat in the car) and which battles can be avoided (letting Abby choose her own clothes even if they don't match). Negotiation is a key strategy to creating a harmonious home environment. Getting to a place that we can all live with is so much better than "my way or the highway" when parenting a persistent child. Negotiation may look like a weak parenting strategy, but it is really teaching our child how to use her persistence as a positive, and to consider the needs of others to arrive at a solution. And it allows Abby to be spirited without losing a battle of wills against her parents, which will undoubtedly affect her self-esteem. Of course, some things are non-negotiable and have to be accepted. Negotiation also teaches an important life skill: coming up with another acceptable solution when she is dead set against ours.

Having said all of that, consistency is extremely important for the persistent child. Persistent kids are testing limits all of the time. If a limit is non-negotiable (or has been decided already through negotiation), we must remain constant in our enforcement of the limit. As parents of a persistent child, we can't make exceptions to rules without experiencing a big downside: that rule will be tested even harder in the future. Consistency will provide Abby with a sense of security, because we are unwaivering.

I'm sure that there are many people that question how we are raising Abby and where we draw the lines with her (and how on earth could we negotiate with her - isn't that allowing her the power?). For example, when Abby turned three we made a decision to allow her to use all of the equipment at the local playground without any help. The playground is intended for kids who are 5+ years, and has some very challenging equipment (a completely verticle rock wall, for example). Abby has spent the last year proving to us that she can handle the equipment despite her petite stature and young age. She is always very careful and graceful when she uses the equipment. She has never come close to falling, and her persistent nature has helped her to accomplish her goal of being independent on the equipment. Over the summer, Abby and I negotiated to come to a "yes" together... and I decided to let her use the equipment alone at her 3rd birthday. She was very happy with that, and I was happy to be able to make her happy. But she is the youngest kid on the playground using the equipment without help, and I get lots of looks and gasps from other parents. I would imagine other parents of spirited children would "get it."

Positive things that we can tell Abby: You really stick with things. You are committed and decisive. You are assertive. You are independent and capable.

Our own persistence level: I am persistent myself. Mark is not persistent (he doesn't lock in, he easily walks away from arguments that could become battles). When Abby challenges the rules, it usually feels like a personal afront to me [although I can intellectually tell the difference]. Mark has a much easier time being cool and collected and not engaging in a battle of wills. My persistence becomes a hinderance in my relationship with Abby because I have a tendancy to want to have the power in the relationship, which always puts Abby in a losing position. It is hard for me to look for the win/win solution. I need to allow myself time to unlock from the battle, time to regroup and collect myself. As Dr. Phil often says, "do you want to be right, or do you want to be happy?" The answer for myself is that I want to be happy, and having a harmonious home life will definitely make me happy.

In summary, persistence is a great trait to have to become a successful adult. Big things wouldn't happen without persistence. Persistent people are the ones that get stuff done! But persistence can cause big problems in relationships when power struggles are constant. In order to live happily, we need to minimize the power struggles and find ways that our persistence can shine.
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Source: Raising Your Spirited Child by Mary Sheedy Kurcinka
Previous Posts: My Spirited Daughter - Part 1
My Spirited Daughter - Part 2 (Introvert vs. Extravert)
My Spirited Daughter - Part 3 (Intensity)
Next Topic: Perceptive Nature

November 21st - My Spirited Daughter: Part 3 (Intensity)

2006-11-21T11:02:00.000-08:00

Intensity: Abby's strong reaction to her banana breaking in two

November 20th - It's Pottytime, Woody*

2006-11-20T17:30:00.000-08:00

I haven't posted about potty training in a long time, mostly because it makes me want to scream in frustration. Way back in January (oh my gosh - can it really have been that long ago???), I asked for guesses about when the kids would be dry during the day. The latest guess was September 1st, and at the time I thought that was ridiculous.

It's November 20th. Neither kid is potty trained.

Ethan is very close. He will use the potty when asked, and asks to use it about half the time he needs to ask. Recently, he has been waking up in the night to go potty. He likes to wear underwear. More important to the process, he likes to gain approval from his mom and dad.

Abby is another story entirely. She goes through cycles of doing really well, and cycles of not caring one bit about the potty. She doesn't mind a dirty pull-up, but underwear is another story (she will sneak into the bathroom and change her own underwear if she has an accident - she can't stand being wet). We have tried so many different things with her. Stickers, sticker charts, M&Ms, calling Daddy, big praise, little praise, no praise, a talk from her pediatrician, using action figures to ask her to use the facilities, letting her dictate her own schedule, using a timer. None of these are the magical inspiration that has potty trained Abby. The only knowledge I have gained (the hard way, mind you) is that if she is resistant, the best course of action is no action. Forcing her to do something never works.

From everything I have heard from anyone who has struggled with potty training, the answer is simple. The kids will do it in their own time.

So.... anyone want to revise their guess? ;)

*The real line is "It's partytime, Woody" (from Toy Story)

November 19th - A Sunday Night Haiku

2006-11-19T19:17:00.000-08:00

scrapbooking weekend,
alas you are over now.
now I must catch Z's.